You’re more likely to achieve your goals when they’re not in conflict with your values or “core” values— the attributes, concepts, and qualities that are important to you.
Core Values are the map-the vehicle to get you to where you want to go.
They give you direction and help you maintain consistency when things get hard.
They give you a set of rules that your actions have to align with
They are your fundamental beliefs.
They are the driving force behind your habits.
So, when we think about a dream and wanting to turn it into reality, we can refer back to our values to see if we are in alignment with where we want to go.
If we want to make a million dollars, your values may be work, money, success, etc.
If our dream is to make a million dollars and your values are love, connection, and adventure, then our values do not align with that dream.
Elicitation means to draw or bring out or forth; educe; evoke: to elicit the truth; to elicit a response with a question so that is what we are going to do today.
So, you need to first create some awareness.
If you are in a relationship, have your partner or spouse do the exercise as well. Then you can come together and compare to create awareness within your relationship and have a deeper understanding of where you both are.
You can also do this together creating awareness around your relationship and how those values relate to your individual values.
How would you want to be described?
What is the story you would hope someone else would tell about how you show up for your life?
Make this your vividly, wildly detailed story.
My story: I am someone who acts out of integrity and shows up every day in my life. I am healthy and strong with a growth mindset so that I can take on the hard stuff and come through the other side even stronger. I am also someone who is compassionate and loving always acting and responding from a place of love and understanding. I work to live but don’t live to work and the work that I do is a reflection of who I am and my core values.
Start creating your story listing out your core values.
For example, adventure, fun, love, contribution, lifestyle, integrity, harmony, health, family, friends, empathy, compassion, fairness, humility, courage, humor, security, personal development, political leadership, and creativity. These are just some of the words that refer to common values. You probably have your own words.
Quickly and spontaneously as it comes to mind, make a list of everything you value — list as many values as you can think of in a few minutes.
Now pick the first 10 values on your list and write them down in order of importance, from the most important to the least.
Who do you have to consistently be and how would you have to consistently act to have that story come true?
This is me: I am a person that is strength, support, and reason. I live in my truth every day. My actions are a direct reflection of who I am at my core.
Examine your list and think about whether these values and the order in which they are listed truly reflect what you value most in your life today. Many of us continue to live by values that we developed when we were younger, which may be obsolete in the present.
For example, someone might continue to put adventure and fun at the top of their list, when in their current situation they should place a higher value on health and family. Now, after careful consideration, rewrite the order of importance of your values, to reflect more accurately how you want to live today.
What would it actually take? What is the plan?
Ask better questions about the things in your life that you are doing and how you are taking action.
My question: What do I need to do every day to bring awareness to my dreams and values?
My answer: Gratitude, affirmations, personal growth & development
Make daily connections with ladies and provide support and inspiration while adding value. This helps when they are ready to say yes to one of my programs because they know me in my truth
For each of your top 3 values, list 3 ways that you can experience that value every day or every week. Try to find easy ways to fulfill the value. What are three ways that every day or every week you can experience adventure, fun, love, making a contribution – whatever is on your list? (My top 3 are Health, Growth, Connection)
Value #1: Health
I can fulfill this value on a regular basis by:
Action #1 Moving my body every day
Action #2 Being aware of what I am eating and making choices on how foods make me feel
Action #3 Mindset/Mental health: journaling/gratitude practice and meditating
Value #2: Growth
I can fulfill this value on a regular basis by:
Action #1 Reading something inspirational daily and reflecting on how I can implement that inspiration into my life
Action #2 Reading/listening to educational items: books, articles, podcasts, blogs, etc.
Action #3 Attending as many free training sessions offered by colleagues as I can to continue learning my trade
Value #3: Connection
I can fulfill this value on a regular basis by:
Action #1 Making time every day to be present and engaging with my husband
Action #2 Connecting with ladies via social media to provide service and support
Action #3 Making time every day to connect with me via mediation and journaling so that I can show up as the best version of myself
If you are doing this with a partner, compare your values and the way you fulfill them. If they are similar, the chances are that the relationship is stable. Differences are an indication of possible conflict. But once a conflict has been identified, it can be solved. You can begin to understand and accept your differences, or you can work to reconcile your values and means of fulfilling them.
It’s a good practice to review your list of values every 6 months to a year and change them to reflect your current situation and what you truly want now.
