success |

Do you have a dream or a goal you are shooting to achieve?

Are you SOOO excited because achieving that dream or goal could LITERALLY change your life?

Do you have people around you that are excited for you and supportive of you, NO MATTER WHAT?

How about that same support for everything you do?

Is your spouse supportive of your efforts? How about your parents?

As much as I would like to say yes, that is the case for most of us, it, unfortunately, is not.

When we launch something big or even do something that WE want to do that falls outside of the expectations of our loved ones, we generally do not have the support of those closest to us.

Why is that?

Well, if you are embarking on something so big that will not only change YOUR life but theirs as well, they may experience fear. And we all know how fear can dictate EVERYTHING!

There could also be a lack of understanding. If you have kept a dream or goal to yourself, like starting a business, and then suddenly come home and announce that you are quitting your job and going all-in on your business, it can be quite alarming to your family.

Especially if they depend on your stable income. This could be a shock and with no other conversation around it, it can cause some issues.

We have all types of relationships in our lives that influence our decisions.

I have talked to so many women that are not even TRYING to shoot for their dreams because of what the family, husband, or friends might think.

I also have talked to women that have tried and given up because they did not have the support they needed.

It is so important to have support because change is hard.

Part of this change is learning how to set boundaries.

Mel Robbins said:

“Boundaries are the courage you need to put yourself 1st. They are the fence around the yard called your life.”

She also said (and I LOVE this one):

“Boundaries are the no trespassing sign between where you end and someone else begins. They make you treat people how you want to be treated.”

Take a look at your “tribe”. The people you spend the most time with. Are these people supportive of you? Do they encourage you?

Or do they break you down and make you feel bad? Do they discourage you from going after your dreams?

Seriously, take a look because you will only be as good as those you surround yourself with.

If you are wanting to go after a dream or achieve a goal and nobody supports you, the chances of you succeeding are slim to none.

You are worth more than that so it’s time to thin the herd.

Now, I am not saying that you need to get a divorce or cut all of your friends and family out of your life.

As long as these folks aren’t toxic, then they can stay. You just should not turn to them for support.

Set your boundaries. Set them for yourself so that you won’t have any expectations from these folks. If they get on board, cool. If not, move past it.

Set boundaries so that they do not badmouth you or your dream. Don’t allow them to tear you down.

Remember, when you are trying to do something “out of the box”, non-traditional, or something different, the people closest to you are afraid for you.

They are afraid of your failure.

And they are afraid of your success.

So one of my experiences is (and you can probably identify with this) were my several network marketing endeavors.

I have been with a handful of companies. It was NEVER easy for me because my family was always poor and didn’t believe in any alternative ways to make money other than working. Sometimes working more than one job.

When I discovered network marketing, I thought I had hit gold as we all do. The problem was, I didn’t have enough belief in myself that I could actually be successful so I would quit.

I would look to my family and then eventually friends for support but only got negative judgment and no support at all. So I would quit.

I would go back to working more than one job.

And the next opportunity would show up and off I would run excited right back into the same non-supporting environment.

I REALLY wanted to be financially free and have time freedom.

And I REALLY wanted to help people.

But I couldn’t get out of my own way.

My dream was not bigger than the people I depended on and their opinions.

Fast forward to now…I decided I needed to take this journey to become a Transformation Success Coach.

Now was the time.

I had the full support of my husband, but, it is still difficult because he doesn’t quite get it.

But he is learning and he is trying.

My friends have been 100% supportive.

My older generation family members are still not quite sure what I do and how I can make a living at it because, well, we will just chalk it up to the “old school” mentality.

So what’s different now?

My friend base has changed a bit.

I no longer surround myself with those that were not supportive and only gave me negative judgment.

I realized it wasn’t just about what my dream was, they were like that no matter what was going on.

People who love you get REALLY uncomfortable with change and growth because they may not be ready to walk alongside you.

And that’s ok!

It has nothing to do with me so I now limit my exposure.

I don’t talk too much about what I do around my family.

If they ask, I give them a brief update.

If they start spinning off onto a tangent of negativity or misunderstanding, I don’t waste energy explaining.

I just politely say this is what I am doing, I love, and I am good at it.

That usually ends the conversation…until the next time and I say it all again.

I am now connecting with like-minded women.

Due to the amazing ability of connection through social media platforms, I am able to connect and support and receive support from women who are just like me.

In return, we lift each other up and encourage each other on our journeys.

Doing these things has really helped my mindset and the belief I have in myself.

I encourage you to take a look at your tribe.

See who fits and who doesn’t and start surrounding yourself with those who support your dreams.

Find mentors or a community of like-minded people who will inspire you, encourage you, hold you accountable, and challenge you.

If you are the smartest person in the room, you need a new tribe.

If you are the most positive person in the room, you need a new tribe.

If you are reaching for big dreams and working on goals to get there and your circle is content with mediocrity and comfort, you need a new tribe.

I am here to help!

If you are ready to take the steps to grow, learn, strive, and thrive, contact me!

I have a new program specifically for ladies wanting to start or grow their own businesses and who are ready to LAUNCH where we work on mindset mastery and actionable strategies without all of the fancy websites, followings, and click funnels.

I also still have my program for ladies who want to grow and step into their power of financial, spiritual, and emotional strength but may not be looking at the business aspect.

Either way, I have a solution for you!

Don’t let the investment in yourself be a hindrance to your success!

But you have to contact me so that we can look at where you are and find a solution to get you to where you want to be. Click on my calendar link and let’s get started!

http://bit.ly/TiffenysBreakthroughCall

Well, here we are fresh into the new year and new DECADE! I waited to write about his topic until we were closer to the end of the, what I call, “honeymoon period” that encompasses the “out with the old, in with the new” mindset that we all have when we turn over a new year. What’s unique about this one, is that it’s also a new DECADE. That means 10 New YEARS, and depending on how young you are, you have already made it through a few decades. For me, it has been 4, now in my 5th! WOW!!! That’s a lot! And boy, have I come a LONG way in my life!

I have never been one for “resolutions”. They rank up there with “diets” and I believe setting you up right away for failure because of the stigma just around the words themselves. Generally, people make resolutions like “I am going to lose 50 lbs”, or “I am going to eat healthily”, or “I am going to work out every day”. And then, January 1 hits, and you are off and running, pushing yourself toward the idea of what you think you want and then by mid-February, give up because you are so overwhelmed with the sudden changes that you don’t believe you will ever make it. This same process occurs when we try to make other lifestyle changes and pool them into the “resolutions” category.

So now, let’s look at the definition of “resolution”. It means “a firm decision to do or not to do something”. That’s it. When we make resolutions, we have every intention of doing whatever it is, but we don’t have a plan. We don’t usually have systems set up to help us succeed so, we quit and inevitably, fail. There is also an “all or nothing” attachment to whatever that something is.

Intention, on the other hand, is “a thing intended; an aim or plan” and a goal is “the object of a person’s ambition or effort; an aim or desired result” and goal setting “involves the development of an action plan designed to motivate and guide a person or group toward a goal”. Intention and goal setting go hand in hand. It is the expansion of a resolution because we actually can take action by even implementing small steps that are mapped out in a plan. And because the plan involves steps, you need to be specific.

So, instead of making a resolution of “I am going to lose weight”, make an intention of “I am going to lose 20 pounds this year and I am going to get there by taking these steps….” and actually WRITE out your plan, break it down into daily manageable steps. As you accomplish each step, you check it off the list and receive instant gratification and a feeling of accomplishment. Then you do the same thing the next day.

Now, take it one step further. Think about how you want to FEEL if you accomplish this goal. THAT is the true magic behind the success. We aren’t seeking the outcome, we are seeking how we want to FEEL about the outcome. How do you feel when you are 20 pounds lighter? Do you feel healthier, happier, more comfortable in your body? Do you feel sexy and confident? That is what you are really after!

Lastly, if you fall down, and you will, brush yourself off and try again. There is no “all or nothing” when you are working toward a goal. When you fall, reflect on what happened to make you fall. What can you do differently the next time? This is all part of the journey. And this is where you will grow. You will be able to set intentions and make a plan to get you there. Notice I did not say “fail”. To fail means to “be unsuccessful in achieving one’s goal”. If you are constantly working, falling, getting back up, and starting again, this is not failing in my eyes. As long as you don’t give up, you won’t fail.

I challenge you to sit down and look at the things in your life you want to achieve. Weightloss, conquering your debt, or any behavior you would like to change. Pick the top 5-10 things on that list and decide how you are going to get there. Map out your plan, set your intentions, and start! Taking it one step at a time means progress so don’t try and overwhelm yourself trying to do it all at once.

You’ve got this! I believe in you!

Tag: success

Choosing Your Tribe

Resolutions, Intentions, and Goals