Just a quick note about relationships: Relationships are important. Relationships are necessary. Relationships should also be healthy and based on open trust and communication, although, some relationships can be difficult, even toxic. We deal with all types of relationships every day. The important thing to remember about relationships is to always maintain honesty and respect, not only for others, but for yourself. If you don’t have that, the relationship will never survive.
I was raised in an environment where the only healthy relationships that existed for me were with my father and his side of the family. Unfortunately, I only had time with them every other weekend until I was in 8th grade, but it was enough to establish a base line for my later years when I was FINALLY able to rid myself of toxic relationships and really cherish the ones that serve me. I realized that I needed to let go of expectations and that I cannot control another person’s feelings or reactions. And most importantly, I learned to let go of the toxic relationships that did not serve me. It was difficult to let some of those relationships go, but it was also very empowering.
I have recently done some reflection on my relationships and how I interact with others. I am learning that as I continue to grow in love, my relationships are growing in love too. I can honestly say that I am incredibly blessed to have healthy, successful relationships in my life.
If you find yourself caught up in a difficult relationship or a relationship that isn’t going the way you planned, you need to check in with yourself. Do you have open, honest communication with this person? Do you have expectations of this person that have not been expressed? Do you look to change something about this person? Is the relationship serving you or do you spend more time fighting and trying to find happiness within the relationship?
When you create a relationship with someone, remember that it is two sided, a give and take, so if you want to have a good relationship, you need to nurture that relationship with love, honesty, openness, and communication. We often place all kinds of expectations on the people we have relationships with and those expectations tend to backfire because they are often not communicated to the other person, therefore turning a two way relationship into a one-sided, uphill battle.
One last thing…we were not put on this earth to change people. It is not our job to judge or decide how someone should live. We were put here for a ton of different reasons with a few of them being kindness, acceptance, and love. If a relationship just does not work, walk away and focus all of that energy into something good. Stop wasting your energy on something that will never be. As hard as it is to walk away, it is even harder to stay in an unhealthy relationship. Remember, your relationship will mirror what you are putting into it. If there is no trust, honesty, and love, then chances are, you don’t see those things in yourself. Look inside yourself and take this as an opportunity to focus on you and improve your life. I believe in you!
