dreams |

June 23, 2020June 23, 2020

Choosing Your Tribe

Do you have a dream or a goal you are shooting to achieve?

Are you SOOO excited because achieving that dream or goal could LITERALLY change your life?

Do you have people around you that are excited for you and supportive of you, NO MATTER WHAT?

How about that same support for everything you do?

Is your spouse supportive of your efforts? How about your parents?

As much as I would like to say yes, that is the case for most of us, it, unfortunately, is not.

When we launch something big or even do something that WE want to do that falls outside of the expectations of our loved ones, we generally do not have the support of those closest to us.

Why is that?

Well, if you are embarking on something so big that will not only change YOUR life but theirs as well, they may experience fear. And we all know how fear can dictate EVERYTHING!

There could also be a lack of understanding. If you have kept a dream or goal to yourself, like starting a business, and then suddenly come home and announce that you are quitting your job and going all-in on your business, it can be quite alarming to your family.

Especially if they depend on your stable income. This could be a shock and with no other conversation around it, it can cause some issues.

We have all types of relationships in our lives that influence our decisions.

I have talked to so many women that are not even TRYING to shoot for their dreams because of what the family, husband, or friends might think.

I also have talked to women that have tried and given up because they did not have the support they needed.

It is so important to have support because change is hard.

Part of this change is learning how to set boundaries.

Mel Robbins said:

“Boundaries are the courage you need to put yourself 1st. They are the fence around the yard called your life.”

She also said (and I LOVE this one):

“Boundaries are the no trespassing sign between where you end and someone else begins. They make you treat people how you want to be treated.”

Take a look at your “tribe”. The people you spend the most time with. Are these people supportive of you? Do they encourage you?

Or do they break you down and make you feel bad? Do they discourage you from going after your dreams?

Seriously, take a look because you will only be as good as those you surround yourself with.

If you are wanting to go after a dream or achieve a goal and nobody supports you, the chances of you succeeding are slim to none.

You are worth more than that so it’s time to thin the herd.

Now, I am not saying that you need to get a divorce or cut all of your friends and family out of your life.

As long as these folks aren’t toxic, then they can stay. You just should not turn to them for support.

Set your boundaries. Set them for yourself so that you won’t have any expectations from these folks. If they get on board, cool. If not, move past it.

Set boundaries so that they do not badmouth you or your dream. Don’t allow them to tear you down.

Remember, when you are trying to do something “out of the box”, non-traditional, or something different, the people closest to you are afraid for you.

They are afraid of your failure.

And they are afraid of your success.

So one of my experiences is (and you can probably identify with this) were my several network marketing endeavors.

I have been with a handful of companies. It was NEVER easy for me because my family was always poor and didn’t believe in any alternative ways to make money other than working. Sometimes working more than one job.

When I discovered network marketing, I thought I had hit gold as we all do. The problem was, I didn’t have enough belief in myself that I could actually be successful so I would quit.

I would look to my family and then eventually friends for support but only got negative judgment and no support at all. So I would quit.

I would go back to working more than one job.

And the next opportunity would show up and off I would run excited right back into the same non-supporting environment.

I REALLY wanted to be financially free and have time freedom.

And I REALLY wanted to help people.

But I couldn’t get out of my own way.

My dream was not bigger than the people I depended on and their opinions.

Fast forward to now…I decided I needed to take this journey to become a Transformation Success Coach.

Now was the time.

I had the full support of my husband, but, it is still difficult because he doesn’t quite get it.

But he is learning and he is trying.

My friends have been 100% supportive.

My older generation family members are still not quite sure what I do and how I can make a living at it because, well, we will just chalk it up to the “old school” mentality.

So what’s different now?

My friend base has changed a bit.

I no longer surround myself with those that were not supportive and only gave me negative judgment.

I realized it wasn’t just about what my dream was, they were like that no matter what was going on.

People who love you get REALLY uncomfortable with change and growth because they may not be ready to walk alongside you.

And that’s ok!

It has nothing to do with me so I now limit my exposure.

I don’t talk too much about what I do around my family.

If they ask, I give them a brief update.

If they start spinning off onto a tangent of negativity or misunderstanding, I don’t waste energy explaining.

I just politely say this is what I am doing, I love, and I am good at it.

That usually ends the conversation…until the next time and I say it all again.

I am now connecting with like-minded women.

Due to the amazing ability of connection through social media platforms, I am able to connect and support and receive support from women who are just like me.

In return, we lift each other up and encourage each other on our journeys.

Doing these things has really helped my mindset and the belief I have in myself.

I encourage you to take a look at your tribe.

See who fits and who doesn’t and start surrounding yourself with those who support your dreams.

Find mentors or a community of like-minded people who will inspire you, encourage you, hold you accountable, and challenge you.

If you are the smartest person in the room, you need a new tribe.

If you are the most positive person in the room, you need a new tribe.

If you are reaching for big dreams and working on goals to get there and your circle is content with mediocrity and comfort, you need a new tribe.

I am here to help!

If you are ready to take the steps to grow, learn, strive, and thrive, contact me!

I have a new program specifically for ladies wanting to start or grow their own businesses and who are ready to LAUNCH where we work on mindset mastery and actionable strategies without all of the fancy websites, followings, and click funnels.

I also still have my program for ladies who want to grow and step into their power of financial, spiritual, and emotional strength but may not be looking at the business aspect.

Either way, I have a solution for you!

Don’t let the investment in yourself be a hindrance to your success!

But you have to contact me so that we can look at where you are and find a solution to get you to where you want to be. Click on my calendar link and let’s get started!

http://bit.ly/TiffenysBreakthroughCall

June 10, 2020June 10, 2020

Turning Dreams into Goals

We all have dreams right?

To have a lasting, loving relationship.

To start a business.

To have a satisfying career.

To have absolute health and wellness.

To be wealthy.

To own a home.

To own your dream car.

These are some dreams that many of us have.

So what exactly is a dream?

I personally love this definition: a cherished aspiration, ambition, or ideal.

But, let’s take a little bit deeper.

When we talk about a dream, there is an underlying feeling attached to that dream.

Usually, it is a feeling we are trying to achieve.

Feelings of stability, freedom, and accomplishment are all feelings that are the most common when we talk about dreams.

Now let’s talk about goals.

A goal is a person’s ambition or effort, an aim or desired result.

Another way to say this is a goal is a dream in ACTION.

So now think about a dream you have.

Is this dream something that you can turn into a goal?

Can you create an action plan of steps to start making this dream a reality?

What would it take to get you there?

I know when I had this dream of being my own boss and being able to help others, I had no idea what it would look like.

I started to ruminate on all of the possibilities of what I could do professionally that would get me to where I wanted to be.

All the time, I was always “coaching” people in their relationships, careers, and life in general, but I didn’t know that being a coach was an actual thing I could do.

I looked into becoming a teacher, a therapist, a guidance counselor, and even looked into various HR type positions.

All of these were definitely doable but I was not prepared to take on any more student loans to get the education I needed.

So I kept searching.

Finally, the idea of being a coach hit me like a ton of bricks so I started investigating.

I looked at what would be required and found that certification was not required so I wouldn’t have to invest a ton of money upfront before I could get started.

So I went to work on my action plan.

The very first thing on my list: hire my own coach so that I could experience it from the other side and also work on my own shit in the process.

From there I listed out the rest of what I needed to just get started.

It was a simple list of things that were cost-effective and attainable actions I could take.

They were small, attainable goals so that I could keep from feeling overwhelmed.

I committed to 2 hours per day to work toward my main goal.

By the end of my coaching package, I had made the decision that I was going to LAUNCH and I did exactly that just a few short months later.

I was officially operating my very own coaching practice!

Was it perfect?

NO!

And it still isn’t.

Because I am still learning and working toward my goals which means things change, including ME.

You see, a dream is just a dream.

Hoping and wishing it to happen is not going to make it happen.

The ONLY way to make your dream your reality is to take ACTION.

And, you can have ANYTHING you desire.

Does it take work?

Sure it does!

But here is the secret:

Decide now what it is that you want to do, commit to yourself and that goal, and show up and do the work to get there.

You are worth every bit of it!

So now, I want to give you some tips on how to set goals and actually achieve them!

So you have this dream, right?

And you are ready to take action to achieve it, but where do you start?

First, start brainstorming. If you are wanting to start a business, brainstorm all of the things that you like or love to do.

Then research what of those things can you actually make money doing? Find people in that industry. Connect with a community that can support you and can provide some guidance.

The next thing you need to do is list out the things that are REQUIRED for you to get started and the things that can wait. You need to focus on the required items first. Again, this will take some research.

Reach out to your community to gain some insight.

Now, these items sometimes have sub-categories or tasks that need to happen in order to complete said item on your list. This is where I pick ONE of the required items and break out each sub-task and then SCHEDULE IT into my calendar. Try not to do more than 3 per day and ONLY focus on these items. This will keep you focused and moving forward one step at a time.

The more you time block, the more you have control over your progress and success of completion. Pretty soon, you will notice that your results of completion have elevated you to a feeling of accomplishment and success!

So let me ask you, now that I have simplified the process, do you think you can get started moving forward turning your dreams into goals?

If you need support in your efforts, let me know! I would love to talk to you more about where you are and where you want to be! I am currently looking to help ladies new to the entrepreneur arena. If this is you and you are ready to launch and grow, book a free 30-minute call with me here: http://bit.ly/TiffenysBreakthroughCall

February 24, 2020February 24, 2020

Are You Excited About Your Life?

Today we are going to talk about YOUR life and check-in to see if you are excited about the life you are creating and if you are not, then what needs to happen to make the shift?

I say “creating” because every new day is a blank canvass. You are the artist and the creator of your own life. Nobody else can take that from you. If you don’t have it, it’s because you CHOSE to give it away. Notice I said CHOSE. You had to have made a DECISION to let someone else have control of your life. And NOW is the time to take ACTION and get your power back!

Do you have big dreams?

Most dreams don’t become reality because we miss the most important step. Having an action plan! Action is the only way to turn a dream into a goal. You have to first MAKE A DECISION. Make a decision to pursue that goal or procrastinate. Either way, you made a decision.

Second, you need to COMMIT. Commit to the dream. Commit to the goal. Commit to the people in your life who are going to be with you on this journey. And commit to YOURSELF!

Third, SHOW UP, DO THE WORK, AND WATCH EVERYTHING YOU WANT SHOW UP!

So, what is it that you want to do? What is your #1 dream right now?

Write it down!

Is your dream a big one?

Does it make you a little scared to think about it?

Are you constantly thinking about it or fantasizing about it?

What are your beliefs around it? Both positive and negative.

You may have beliefs that are holding you back because those beliefs are not your truth. Check-in with yourself here and reflect on your self-talk. Reflect on everything you were told growing up. Now is the time to get rid of any belief that no longer serves you.

Do you think you are worthy?

The majority of the women I work with say worthiness is a big obstacle for them. They feel that they are not worthy of their dreams or are not educated enough to even take the step into action. So they don’t.

I am here to tell you that YOU ARE WORTHY! You are totally worthy and deserving of EXTREME wealth, joy, and romance! (Feel free to steal this affirmation because it covers all of the bases, and, it’s a good one!)

Do you think it is attainable?

You will never know unless you try. You must have a belief in yourself!

Be careful with this one. Your EGO is going to have a ton of input because your ego will tell you to be afraid and that no, it will never be attainable. Here’s why…your ego does not want change. Your ego wants you to stay right where you are, comfortable. Comfortable in your sadness. Comfortable in your self-pity. Comfortable in your current situation, whatever it is.

What steps are you taking to get there?

I encourage you to design your life as if it has already happened. Literally write out every detail and feel the excitement brewing. Sit quietly for a while and just envision that life. Every. Single. Detail.

Now, how do you feel in that life?

Write it down. Write down everything you want. Write out the details. Write out your feelings. Good AND bad.

I say bad because you may even have some negative emotions come up in the process. Some negative self-talk. Remember your friend the Ego? Your ego self telling you it’s not worth it because it will be too hard.

That’s ok.

Sit with these emotions. Give recognition to them. This awareness is going to give you tons of feedback as to why you aren’t already living this life.

The best part of this is creating that awareness because now you know where the work needs to happen to get there!

Do you want to dive deeper and discover where you want to be and how to take action to get there? Book your free 30-Minute breakthrough call today! http://bit.ly/TiffenysBreakthroughCall

September 2, 2019September 2, 2019

A Master Chef Lesson

I was struck so deeply last night by a realization while watching Master Chef Challenge Season 10. Hubby and I have been following it most of the season. We were rooting for a very young contestant, Micah, who was only 19 years old. From the very first episode when he received his apron from Chef Ramsey, he was so grateful and so humbled. Why? Because Chef Ramsey said he BELIEVED in him. This kid was competing on this show all alone. No family, no friends, and he gave up everything to be there. Fast forward to the Family Reunion episode. The contestants’ family members were invited to come and support their loved ones in the competition. Micah had no one. As they were introducing the various family members, the camera kept panning over to Micah, and the look on his face every time was just heartbreaking.

As the competition went on, you could see Micah’s confidence deteriorating. When it was time to present the dish, he was the last one chosen. The entire time you could see the deflated, defeated look on his face. I knew right then that he had given up. He stopped trying and succumbed to his lonely realization of not having anyone to support him. This sealed his fate.

When he was asked to remove his apron, he lost it. He told the judges how grateful he was for the journey and how much he had learned. He also said that he gained so much more from the experience because his whole family told him they did not support him. His mom told him he would fall flat on his face and she would not be there to pick him up. But the support from the judges and the other constants was heartfelt and appreciated. What an awful thing to say to your son! Then, Chef Ramsey did what he does when he wants to be amazing. He told Micah that after the show he would work with him and help him achieve any dreams he had. Micah thanked him and said it would be an honor. It was at that point, his face started to light back up.

Why do I feel compelled to talk about a TV show? There are a couple of notable things going on here. First and foremost, belief. Sometimes it is difficult to push through when it is just you and nobody else rooting for you to win. It makes it so much harder to stay focused and positive. Think about it as an adult and then rewind to your childhood. Imagine how devastating it would be to hear such awful things from your mother. The processing is very different and extremely damaging.

Two other notable things are going on here. Realizing and working toward a dream and not giving up. These two go hand in hand. Micah had a dream and he did everything he could to make it come true. He didn’t give up. Even when I thought he did, he came back around and realized he wasn’t in it alone. He had Chef Ramsey in his corner! He also had all of the viewers in his corner, rooting for him. Believing in him and his dream.

I have been in Micah’s shoes. Everything I did growing up and throughout most of my adult life, I looked for my mother’s support. Hell, I would have settled for ANY form of acknowledgment and encouragement, but I never once got it. The only thing I got from her was jealousy and hatred. If it wasn’t for my dad and the rest of my family and friends, my outcome would have been a lot different.

So, are you finding yourself alone in your corner when it comes to your dreams? Do you have the support you need from your loved ones? If not, I highly recommend you reach out to someone. Find a mentor, a coach, or just a loving, supportive ear to bounce your thoughts and experiences off of. We all need someone to help us celebrate our wins! And if you are having trouble finding someone, talk to me! I already believe in you so we are halfway there. You just have to raise your hand.