Inspiration/Coaching

March 3, 2019March 3, 2019

Self Care

Have you ever been going so hard and fast that you get to the point where you just want to shut down and curl up into a ball and pretend the world didn’t exist? Do you want to go to that yoga class or start eating healthy but there is just no TIME? Do you want to take a vacation but just can’t seem to unplug completely from the world, your job, your life?

If you are like me, this sounds all too familiar. I am guilty of letting my time be consumed by everything other than what is truly important. Taking care of ME! My lack of self care has manifested in so many ways. Illness, stress, depression, anxiety, and down right feelings of lack of control of my life and a lack of progress in manifesting my desires. It has to stop!

I have workaholic tendencies and fall too easily into believing that if I am not constantly working, I am not making progress. I also have the tendency to put everything in front of what I need. I am a caretaker, I am a people pleaser, and I am always looking for the distraction to not focus on what I need. That is, until this year. I made a promise to myself (NOT a resolution) to make more time for me. It has been very difficult to make these changes, but has been so rewarding. It has only been a couple of months, but I can already feel and see the shift happening. I know deep down inside that I cannot be the best version of myself until I make time for myself and just do ME!

Selfish? Maybe. But it has been a long road and I got to the point that I just could not give anymore. My mental and physical well being was in serious jeopardy. Some of the challenges I am and have faced are having to step back from everything. I am definitely getting push back in some of these areas, but I know it will be temporary. However, this all causes me great anxiety because I know where I need and want to be, but am trying to move mountains to find a way to get there. I have a ton of emotions and feelings coming up that I am having to work through, and I am ok with it. I know it is only helping me grow and be the best version of myself. I get overwhelmed at times and that is ok too. It gives me a chance to step back, take a breath, and start over.

So…what am I doing for self care? First and foremost, I am SLOWING DOWN! Running a million miles an hour at everything all at once only causes more stress and anxiety. I am taking everything one day at a time. Stopping to rest and “smelling the roses”. I take every opportunity to enjoy the views around me and the time I spend with those I love. Yep, some days that means just sitting and vegging out on tv, the sky, a book, or whatever I feel at the moment. I am also getting back to my yoga practice and adding more days during the week for my Tai Chi practice. I have an hour commute each way to and from work so I use that time as my rolling classroom. I listen to all of my favorite audio books by my favorite authors, coaches, and speakers. I tap into podcasts and online trainings from everyone in my business organization. I practice my daily affirmations and visualization exercises.

Is it working? Heck yes! I am getting stronger and more confident. I am finally ok with telling people “no” when the ask doesn’t serve me or I just can’t make it happen. The most difficult part is saying “no” without the guilt, but I am there…most of the time.

A great analogy that was recently shared with me: you have a pitcher of water and several glasses to fill. You pour all of the water into the half of the glasses but your pitcher has run out. The next step…fill the pitcher again and fill the remaining glasses. YOU are the pitcher! When you are empty, there is nothing more to give. Take the time to fill up your pitcher! What are you going to do today to practice self care?

February 22, 2019February 22, 2019

Having a bad day?

So, you are having a bad day. It started first thing in the morning when you overslept and were late getting out the door and you HAD to be in the office by 8am. You spilled your coffee and had to change. You got in the car and started driving…straight into a traffic jam. You were TRYING to be calm and patient, but it seemed that the Universe was throwing everything it had at you. And then…you spilled your coffee AGAIN! You thought you may as well turn around, go back home, and write this day off as a loss. But you were stuck in that traffic jam with nowhere to go but straight to the office. You couldn’t help but wonder if you were being punished for something.

You FINALLY made it to the office, 20 minutes late for your meeting and frazzled by the morning’s events. You are just settling in, and the meeting ends, earlier than anticipated, so you missed the entire thing! You make it to your desk, open your email and find that your boss had emailed you several times with items that you made errors on and they need to be fixed ASAP. (Why is he constantly picking on me?) Your phone rings, more problems. (Why is this happening today?) Your office manager comes to chat, more problems. (Can’t someone else handle this?) And then you realize, you forgot your lunch. UGH!!!!

I am sure everyone can identify with some version of a bad day. But what makes a day “bad”? Well, for one, your mindset. It’s easy when things don’t go as planned and to play the victim. It’s difficult to look at the situation and say, “what have I done to cause this?” or “what is the universe (insert your version of divine energy) trying to tell me?”

With this example, the very first instance of oversleeping was just the beginning. Our first reaction is to fly out of bed and run around trying to get ready quickly. The reality is, you are just causing yourself more anxiety about being late and causing other things to unfold. Here is a thought: acknowledge the time, and then tell yourself I am good! I have plenty of time to get where I need to be. And if I am a few minutes late, no big deal! You make the appropriate calls/texts to alert others that you are running behind and then carry on with getting ready…in a calm manner. I bet the remaining events happen very differently or don’t happen at all. Maybe, they push the meeting by half an hour. Maybe, you are walking out of the door calmly and the traffic jam is only a 2 minute slow down to get around a stalled vehicle. Maybe you are in the car listening to your favorites songs and you just don’t care. You are grateful be where you are.

Your mindset has everything to do with what happens to you. You can’t control anything, but you can control how you react. You may still have the bad day, but you can dictate how bad it really is by changing your energy and thoughts around it. It may seem far-fetched for those who are not as versed in this mindful thought process, but I recommend you try it. Then, throw a little gratitude in there and see what happens!

February 10, 2019February 10, 2019

Let’s Talk Money 2

In my previous post, I mentioned “why” I desire more money in my life. I feel like I need to give you a bit of history as to how my “why” came to be. It starts back to when I was young. Growing up, we didn’t have a lot of money. In fact, we were poor. My mother and her beliefs around money inhibited any money coming her way, which, in turn, inhibited it coming my way. When my parents divorced, my brother and I lived full time with our mother, seeing our dad every other weekend. There was a constant battle about her needing the “child support right now” and making me call my dad for it (back then there wasn’t an organized agency that took care of all of that stuff). This was my first real experience with not having money and the difficulty that surrounded getting it.

February 10, 2019February 10, 2019

Let’s Talk Money

I have been doing a TON of personal work around money, so I will be spending a few posts around this topic. I (like many of you) desire more money, but part of my work is defining “why”. The process has not been easy because it taps into the personal relationship I have with money, which starts way back to when I was very young. It starts with how I was educated and the stories I was told about money, which later became deep rooted beliefs. My parents divorced when I was five, so I had two COMPLETELY different exposures to money, although, I was with my mom full time until the middle of 8th grade, so her relationship with money impacted me the most.