Blog | - Part 2

July 21, 2020July 21, 2020

Perspective vs Mindset

Today I want to talk about perspective vs. mindset.

Let’s first look at what perspective is.

Perspective is the way you see the world around you.

We gain our perspective from our past experiences.

Each person will have their own perspective about things based on past experiences.

Let’s take the idea of building a business during a pandemic.

My perspective is that NOW is the time to start building a business.

This is based on MY past experience of knowing things are hard.

Things will always be hard during difficult times.

But I don’t believe that anyone should shy away from adversity and growth because my truth is that I always succeed even when things are hard and so can you.

Someone else may say now is NOT the time to build a business because their past experience has been that they have tried during hard times and have failed, so they gave up and won’t even try.

Let’s create some awareness around your perspective.

Think about a situation that is happening now.

What is YOUR perspective?

Ask yourself these questions:

How you feel now and have you felt like this before?

What has made you feel this way in the past and how is it affecting you TODAY?

Now, mindset, on the other hand, is what we THINK about what we see.

There are two kinds of mindset.

Fixed and growth.

A fixed mindset is based on thinking you already have all that you need and that is all you are going to get.

A growth mindset is based on the belief that there is always a way to do or get more.

Having a fixed mindset means that you don’t always see different perspectives where, having a growth mindset, you see many perspectives.

Knowing this, what is keeping you from having the mindset you want?

It’s the “what ifs”.

Let’s take the starting a business example.

Someone with a fixed mindset’s “what ifs”

What if I don’t make any money?
What if I don’t have any clients or customers?
What if I go all in and lose everything?
What if I fail?

Someone with a growth mindset’s “what ifs”:

What if I make enough money to afford everything I need and can quit my j.o.b.?
What if I have so many clients or customers that I have to put them on a waiting list?
What if I go all in and grow so fast that I have to hire help?
What if I succeed?

As you can see, having a fixed mindset really limits your ability to achieve anything.

Now, if you are comfortable with where you are and you don’t have any goals you are trying to reach, having a fixed mindset is fine.

But, also know that if you don’t grow, you will die.

There should always be places in your life where you are aspiring to grow.

But with growth comes change and most people with a fixed mindset fear change.

And that fear is based on the unknown, things that haven’t happened yet.

So much of what we fear is NOT going to happen, and in fact, focusing on so much fear can cause you to manifest it happening.

So be very careful here.

People with a growth mindset embrace fear.

They also embrace failure because they know that when they fail, they GROW!

This is because they fail, pick themselves back up and go again taking what they have learned and applying it to the next time.

They also know that comfort is the casualty of fear and growth so they get comfortable with being uncomfortable.

So I encourage you to take a look at your perspective.

Do you have the mindset you want?

If you have a fixed mindset, where are you going to aspire to grow in your life so that you don’t stay stagnate?

If you have a growth mindset, what are you working on now?

Where are you headed?

If you are looking to start a business, let me know. My 90-Day Courage to Launch program may be a fit for you.

We do a ton of work around mindset so that you can be ready for growth!

As always, if you would like to talk more about this or any other topic, book a call with me.

The link to my calendar is here.

July 7, 2020July 7, 2020

Feeling Stuck

I know that some of you, and probably all of you, have had this “stuck” feeling more than once your life.

Have you ever felt that you couldn’t move forward on a project or a goal because something inside of you was “blocked” or you were feeling some sort of resistance?

How about knowing you wanted a new job but couldn’t figure out the steps to take action?

What about that great big dream you have and you just KNOW it’s supposed to come to fruition but you just keep dreaming and nothing happens?

This is a big one too. You are in a relationship that is going nowhere and you know you need to get out, but something keeps you stuck in your current state.

I want to tell you that “stuck” is NOT the same thing as being present.

Sure, stuck is a place you feel right here, and right now, but it typically has to do with something in your future which makes it totally NOT the same as being present.

I need you to understand that because a lot of you will use the “I am stuck because I am present” excuse so therefore you can’t take action.

Being present means you are not thinking about the past OR the future.

Your focus is in the here and now, for whatever reason.

It could be focusing on a project, your children, your job.

It could be focusing on being present is keeping you from anxiety.

You are stuck because you have convinced yourself that you are unable to move forward due to various reasons…usually excuses.

So, you are stuck.

Here are some other important things you need to know and some questions you should ask yourself:

Feeling stuck is a choice
1. That’s right, YOU are choosing this. It’s simple, not taking action is a choice.
You are stuck because of your habits and behaviors
1. What are you doing right now to cause this feeling of being stuck?
2. What habits do you turn to that are holding you hostage to this feeling?
3. What needs to change?
You are stuck because you have certain beliefs that are no longer serving you
1. This is a big one. What lies or limiting beliefs are you telling yourself over and over again that are holding you back?
When you think about your beliefs, are you identifying with them or just “going through the motions” out of habit?
1. Yes, this one is two-fold because every ACTION is because of a FEELING and every FEELING is because of a THOUGHT you are thinking and all of those thoughts stem from your beliefs

In order to move forward, you need to assess where you are.

You need to get real honest with yourself here and now because change will not happen until you take action.

So think about what it is you want.

What do you need to change to start the ball rolling?

Reevaluation of your habits and limiting beliefs is imperative

What are you willing to sacrifice to “unstick” yourself?

Sitting for hours in front of the television to binge-watch Tiger King or whatever show you are into is NOT going to get you there.
- I know this because I was doing just that!
- It was my way of avoiding the “hard stuff”
- I would get up having the full intention of working on starting my own business and even time blocked for it.
- The TV won. I would go to work, come home, pour a glass of wine, and sit in front of the TV.
- I would reason away that there is always tomorrow and I was allowed to have this time.
- Pretty soon, that became the norm and the thoughts of starting a business would flutter away and I would succumb to being stuck.
- I would then sit and try and think about other ways that I could start my business, but not leave the couch. Or my wine.
- And then the anxiety would set in.
- I would beat myself up for lack of motivation and actually tell myself that I am stuck here because this was where I was meant to be.
- I didn’t deserve to have a successful business because I was lazy.
- It was also affecting my relationship with my husband because I wasn’t present for him.
- He is not one to sit around much and veg on the TV.
- And this started causing me anxiety.
- But I still desperately wanted to start my own business…but now I was completely overwhelmed on how it was going to happen.
- And then I hired my life coach.
- She helped me identify what was causing my “stuck” feeling and I had to do some serious work around my limiting beliefs and my habits.
Sure, I still watch TV and drink my wine. I LOVE to binge watch my shows. Mostly because I absolutely despise network TV and their ridiculous commercials.
BUT, I make sure that I spend a minimum of 2 hours every day (usually it is 4-6 hours until I start back to work) working on my dreams and goals BEFORE I watch TV. TV is NOT my main focus.
I also make sure I make time to sit and talk with my husband every day BEFORE I watch TV. Most nights during the week, we watch together AFTER we talk.
When I am working my job full-time and coaching in the evenings, I usually am lucky to get an hour of TV time, and that’s ok because TV will not get me to where I want to be.

Now, I know some of you are going to tell me about how overwhelmed and stressed you are.

You can’t add anything more to your plate, so there is NO WAY you are going to be able to move forward at this time.

I have to call BULLSHIT.

Yes, you may be feeling overwhelmed and stressed. But again, look at why that is.

Are you overwhelmed and stressed at a job you KNOW you need to leave but you are CHOOSING to stay by making the excuse that you just don’t have time to update that resume and get it posted online?

Come on now…do hear how ridiculous that sounds?

This is just an excuse.

You need to just make the choice to find the time.

I don’t care if it is 5 minutes per day or 5 hours per day.

Even just committing to ONE HOUR per day to work toward your goals makes a HUGE difference!

If you are truly wanting to eliminate this stuck feeling from your life, you need to take control of those thoughts and habits and get moving.

Ok, I can totally help you here! If you want to talk more, book a call with me! I would love to hear about your situation and see where I can help.

Click here to book your FREE 30 minute Breakthrough Session!

June 23, 2020June 23, 2020

Choosing Your Tribe

Do you have a dream or a goal you are shooting to achieve?

Are you SOOO excited because achieving that dream or goal could LITERALLY change your life?

Do you have people around you that are excited for you and supportive of you, NO MATTER WHAT?

How about that same support for everything you do?

Is your spouse supportive of your efforts? How about your parents?

As much as I would like to say yes, that is the case for most of us, it, unfortunately, is not.

When we launch something big or even do something that WE want to do that falls outside of the expectations of our loved ones, we generally do not have the support of those closest to us.

Why is that?

Well, if you are embarking on something so big that will not only change YOUR life but theirs as well, they may experience fear. And we all know how fear can dictate EVERYTHING!

There could also be a lack of understanding. If you have kept a dream or goal to yourself, like starting a business, and then suddenly come home and announce that you are quitting your job and going all-in on your business, it can be quite alarming to your family.

Especially if they depend on your stable income. This could be a shock and with no other conversation around it, it can cause some issues.

We have all types of relationships in our lives that influence our decisions.

I have talked to so many women that are not even TRYING to shoot for their dreams because of what the family, husband, or friends might think.

I also have talked to women that have tried and given up because they did not have the support they needed.

It is so important to have support because change is hard.

Part of this change is learning how to set boundaries.

Mel Robbins said:

“Boundaries are the courage you need to put yourself 1st. They are the fence around the yard called your life.”

She also said (and I LOVE this one):

“Boundaries are the no trespassing sign between where you end and someone else begins. They make you treat people how you want to be treated.”

Take a look at your “tribe”. The people you spend the most time with. Are these people supportive of you? Do they encourage you?

Or do they break you down and make you feel bad? Do they discourage you from going after your dreams?

Seriously, take a look because you will only be as good as those you surround yourself with.

If you are wanting to go after a dream or achieve a goal and nobody supports you, the chances of you succeeding are slim to none.

You are worth more than that so it’s time to thin the herd.

Now, I am not saying that you need to get a divorce or cut all of your friends and family out of your life.

As long as these folks aren’t toxic, then they can stay. You just should not turn to them for support.

Set your boundaries. Set them for yourself so that you won’t have any expectations from these folks. If they get on board, cool. If not, move past it.

Set boundaries so that they do not badmouth you or your dream. Don’t allow them to tear you down.

Remember, when you are trying to do something “out of the box”, non-traditional, or something different, the people closest to you are afraid for you.

They are afraid of your failure.

And they are afraid of your success.

So one of my experiences is (and you can probably identify with this) were my several network marketing endeavors.

I have been with a handful of companies. It was NEVER easy for me because my family was always poor and didn’t believe in any alternative ways to make money other than working. Sometimes working more than one job.

When I discovered network marketing, I thought I had hit gold as we all do. The problem was, I didn’t have enough belief in myself that I could actually be successful so I would quit.

I would look to my family and then eventually friends for support but only got negative judgment and no support at all. So I would quit.

I would go back to working more than one job.

And the next opportunity would show up and off I would run excited right back into the same non-supporting environment.

I REALLY wanted to be financially free and have time freedom.

And I REALLY wanted to help people.

But I couldn’t get out of my own way.

My dream was not bigger than the people I depended on and their opinions.

Fast forward to now…I decided I needed to take this journey to become a Transformation Success Coach.

Now was the time.

I had the full support of my husband, but, it is still difficult because he doesn’t quite get it.

But he is learning and he is trying.

My friends have been 100% supportive.

My older generation family members are still not quite sure what I do and how I can make a living at it because, well, we will just chalk it up to the “old school” mentality.

So what’s different now?

My friend base has changed a bit.

I no longer surround myself with those that were not supportive and only gave me negative judgment.

I realized it wasn’t just about what my dream was, they were like that no matter what was going on.

People who love you get REALLY uncomfortable with change and growth because they may not be ready to walk alongside you.

And that’s ok!

It has nothing to do with me so I now limit my exposure.

I don’t talk too much about what I do around my family.

If they ask, I give them a brief update.

If they start spinning off onto a tangent of negativity or misunderstanding, I don’t waste energy explaining.

I just politely say this is what I am doing, I love, and I am good at it.

That usually ends the conversation…until the next time and I say it all again.

I am now connecting with like-minded women.

Due to the amazing ability of connection through social media platforms, I am able to connect and support and receive support from women who are just like me.

In return, we lift each other up and encourage each other on our journeys.

Doing these things has really helped my mindset and the belief I have in myself.

I encourage you to take a look at your tribe.

See who fits and who doesn’t and start surrounding yourself with those who support your dreams.

Find mentors or a community of like-minded people who will inspire you, encourage you, hold you accountable, and challenge you.

If you are the smartest person in the room, you need a new tribe.

If you are the most positive person in the room, you need a new tribe.

If you are reaching for big dreams and working on goals to get there and your circle is content with mediocrity and comfort, you need a new tribe.

I am here to help!

If you are ready to take the steps to grow, learn, strive, and thrive, contact me!

I have a new program specifically for ladies wanting to start or grow their own businesses and who are ready to LAUNCH where we work on mindset mastery and actionable strategies without all of the fancy websites, followings, and click funnels.

I also still have my program for ladies who want to grow and step into their power of financial, spiritual, and emotional strength but may not be looking at the business aspect.

Either way, I have a solution for you!

Don’t let the investment in yourself be a hindrance to your success!

But you have to contact me so that we can look at where you are and find a solution to get you to where you want to be. Click on my calendar link and let’s get started!

http://bit.ly/TiffenysBreakthroughCall

June 10, 2020June 10, 2020

Turning Dreams into Goals

We all have dreams right?

To have a lasting, loving relationship.

To start a business.

To have a satisfying career.

To have absolute health and wellness.

To be wealthy.

To own a home.

To own your dream car.

These are some dreams that many of us have.

So what exactly is a dream?

I personally love this definition: a cherished aspiration, ambition, or ideal.

But, let’s take a little bit deeper.

When we talk about a dream, there is an underlying feeling attached to that dream.

Usually, it is a feeling we are trying to achieve.

Feelings of stability, freedom, and accomplishment are all feelings that are the most common when we talk about dreams.

Now let’s talk about goals.

A goal is a person’s ambition or effort, an aim or desired result.

Another way to say this is a goal is a dream in ACTION.

So now think about a dream you have.

Is this dream something that you can turn into a goal?

Can you create an action plan of steps to start making this dream a reality?

What would it take to get you there?

I know when I had this dream of being my own boss and being able to help others, I had no idea what it would look like.

I started to ruminate on all of the possibilities of what I could do professionally that would get me to where I wanted to be.

All the time, I was always “coaching” people in their relationships, careers, and life in general, but I didn’t know that being a coach was an actual thing I could do.

I looked into becoming a teacher, a therapist, a guidance counselor, and even looked into various HR type positions.

All of these were definitely doable but I was not prepared to take on any more student loans to get the education I needed.

So I kept searching.

Finally, the idea of being a coach hit me like a ton of bricks so I started investigating.

I looked at what would be required and found that certification was not required so I wouldn’t have to invest a ton of money upfront before I could get started.

So I went to work on my action plan.

The very first thing on my list: hire my own coach so that I could experience it from the other side and also work on my own shit in the process.

From there I listed out the rest of what I needed to just get started.

It was a simple list of things that were cost-effective and attainable actions I could take.

They were small, attainable goals so that I could keep from feeling overwhelmed.

I committed to 2 hours per day to work toward my main goal.

By the end of my coaching package, I had made the decision that I was going to LAUNCH and I did exactly that just a few short months later.

I was officially operating my very own coaching practice!

Was it perfect?

NO!

And it still isn’t.

Because I am still learning and working toward my goals which means things change, including ME.

You see, a dream is just a dream.

Hoping and wishing it to happen is not going to make it happen.

The ONLY way to make your dream your reality is to take ACTION.

And, you can have ANYTHING you desire.

Does it take work?

Sure it does!

But here is the secret:

Decide now what it is that you want to do, commit to yourself and that goal, and show up and do the work to get there.

You are worth every bit of it!

So now, I want to give you some tips on how to set goals and actually achieve them!

So you have this dream, right?

And you are ready to take action to achieve it, but where do you start?

First, start brainstorming. If you are wanting to start a business, brainstorm all of the things that you like or love to do.

Then research what of those things can you actually make money doing? Find people in that industry. Connect with a community that can support you and can provide some guidance.

The next thing you need to do is list out the things that are REQUIRED for you to get started and the things that can wait. You need to focus on the required items first. Again, this will take some research.

Reach out to your community to gain some insight.

Now, these items sometimes have sub-categories or tasks that need to happen in order to complete said item on your list. This is where I pick ONE of the required items and break out each sub-task and then SCHEDULE IT into my calendar. Try not to do more than 3 per day and ONLY focus on these items. This will keep you focused and moving forward one step at a time.

The more you time block, the more you have control over your progress and success of completion. Pretty soon, you will notice that your results of completion have elevated you to a feeling of accomplishment and success!

So let me ask you, now that I have simplified the process, do you think you can get started moving forward turning your dreams into goals?

If you need support in your efforts, let me know! I would love to talk to you more about where you are and where you want to be! I am currently looking to help ladies new to the entrepreneur arena. If this is you and you are ready to launch and grow, book a free 30-minute call with me here: http://bit.ly/TiffenysBreakthroughCall

May 20, 2020June 15, 2020

Why Now Is The Time To Start

I hope you are all not only surviving, but I hope you are THRIVING during this time.

I personally, at the time of this post, have successfully completed 7 solid weeks of not stepping off of my property during this COVID-19 pandemic.

I started working from home for my job and then transitioned to a furloughed status where I have been working on a new program for my coaching practice and working with clients.

Now, our stay-at-home order has turned into a safer-at-home order that is designed to be a slow transition to a “new normal”.

What does that mean and what does that have to do with our topic today?

Well, as we all know, things have not been normal for the past couple of months. I have talked at length about creating a new normal.

Why?

Because that new normal will become your normal. Guys, we are not going back to the way we were. Not for a long time, if ever!

If you are holding onto that idea, you need to get past it quickly because it will not be the same.

Companies are going to HAVE to offer more work from home options.

More and more people are going to be looking for ways to work from home now more than ever.

So why not you?

Have you thought about starting your own business?

Do you have your own business already but want to increase sales, exposure, and offerings?

NOW is the time.

I know that there is a mixed opinion about this.

Some say that now is NOT the time to start a business because the economy is so unstable and people are not in a growth mindset so failure is imminent.

I don’t agree with this. Especially if you are in or want to be in the service industry, like coaching.

First of all, people need our help and are going to need our help even more as we start to discover what the new normal is.

For those of you that already have a business, how can you pivot so that you can continue to serve and move forward?

So think about what it is that you want to do.

If this is resonating with you, raise your hand!

And above all else, NOW is the time to change your mindset and help others change theirs.

I can personally attest to having to pivot and adjust my mindset to our current, new normal.

When I started my practice, I was geared up to work with women strictly 1 on 1 working on mindset and goals, along with removing blocks, emotional pain, and fears that have been holding them back.

Now, I am using the group format for my coaching so that I can reach the masses.

Recently, I have launched a Mindset Group and now, I am launching a Mastermind Group for women who are ready to take their new-found courage to launch or grow their businesses.

I am also looking at other ways to serve via online courses, workshops, podcast interviews, etc.

Although not all of these things pay me in hard cash, I feel that I receive payment by giving back and helping others.

It also ensures that I stay visible so that when women like you need help, I am the one you call.

Remember, it takes time to get things going and that is why NOW is a perfect time.

Why?

Because we have time NOW.

Because we don’t know what tomorrow will bring.

If I have learned anything through this uncertain time is that waiting is NOT an option!

I may fail, but I will grow and get up and try again.

I also learned that if I suck, I will only get better!

So, I am spending TONS of time while I am home participating in free online training and writing content for my programs.

What are YOU doing with your time?

Are YOU ready to make a difference?

Are you needing help to PIVOT so that your business continues to grow?

Don’t wait until we are past this.

Get that training.

Set up that website.

Do that online course.

Get the research done on what you need to be successful.

Write out those ideas about how you can enhance your offerings.

And TAKE ACTION!

What are you waiting for????

I am here to help!

My 90 Day Action for Change: Courage to Launch Mastermind went live Wednesday, April 29th.

If you are considering starting a business or need help taking your business to the next level, book a call with me, and let’s talk about where you are so that you can get to where you want to be!

Free 30-Minute Breakthrough Call

May 5, 2020May 5, 2020

Needs

The topic for this blog post is needs and how we meet them.

I want you to sit for a minute and really think about what you NEED. Don’t think about what you think everyone needs from you.

This is all about YOUR needs.

And this is how you satisfy those needs.

I can honestly tell you, I have several needs.

I need my morning routine.

I need to move my body every day.

I need human interaction.

I need to be able to give back to the world and leave a positive impact.

I need my outdoor time with nature.

I need music.

I need to keep growing and learning.

So how do I meet these needs?

All human beings have needs that need to be met and we all have various needs that we satisfy in many different ways.

Sometimes in negative ways and sometimes in positive ways.

When I did my coach certification training, I was introduced to the concept of the 6 Human Needs from Tony Robbins.

I want to share this now with you.

Although I am going to talk about YOUR needs today, know that through understanding your needs and how they are met will only help you understand others’ needs so that you can really transform your experience of living and being in a relationship with others.

As I go through the 6 Human Needs, I want you to think about the needs you have and where they fall into these categories.

I also want you to think about how you are meeting these needs.

I know that all of the needs I shared fall into these categories one or more of these categories.

The Six Needs:

Certainty: safe, homey, secure, sure of everything, in control, being taken care of

Uncertainty/Variety: excitement, unexpectedness, spontaneous, creative, flowing, free

Significance: Important, special, worthwhile, acknowledged

Love/Connection: Caring, passionate, warmth, belonging, synchronized, adored

Growth: changing, developing, pursuing new goals, education, meeting new people (if we don’t satisfy this need, we die)

Contribution: expanding, giving, making things better, selfless action, being part of group one adds to, being part of tradition one helps to develop

For me, my needs fall into these categories and how they are met:

My morning routine satisfies my need for Certainty because it’s consistent and happens every day.

Move my body every day definitely satisfies my need for Love/Connection of myself. I meet this need by making sure I move my body every day for at least 30 minutes.

Human interaction satisfies my need for Love/Connection and I meet that need with my coaching & mentoring practice and staying connected (Zoom & Skype in this time) with friends and family.

Giving back to the world and leaving a positive impact satisfies my need for Contribution and I meet that need with my coaching and also being a volunteer Tai Chi instructor. This also satisfies my need for Significance because I feel like I am an important, positive influence on others.

My outdoor time with nature satisfies my need Growth and specifically on the spiritual side. I meet this need by getting outside as often as I can to run, sit in the sun, and even shovel snow during the winter. Camping is one of my favorite ways to satisfy this need and I do that as often as I can. Living in the country also helps.

Music also satisfies my need for Growth and again on the spiritual side. It comes from so deep inside me. I meet this need by always listening to music, especially the 80’s genre. I am known to host my own private dance parties around the house! I just can’t help myself.

My need to keep growing and learning satisfies my need for Growth and I do this by reading at least 10 minutes every day, listening to podcasts, listening to self-help/improvement books on Audible, and constantly participating in online training and classes.

As I was going through the list did any one of these needs really resonate within your body? Is there one that stands out more prominent? What is it? How are you satisfying your needs?

So now I encourage you to really look at what you NEED.

Make that list. Then go through and see how you are meeting those needs.

If you aren’t meeting your needs, find a way to get them met ASAP.

Do you want more information on how this works or anything else you are working on in your life? Book a free 30-minute breakthrough call with me and let’s look at where you are and how you can get to where you want to be!

Click here to schedule YOUR breakthrough call!

April 21, 2020April 21, 2020

Morning Routine and Daily Structure

Today I am going to share with you why having a morning routine and daily structure is so important. Especially now in our current state.

I have seen tons of posts and talked with my clients about how difficult it is to maintain a routine when we have to stay at home.

First, I want to talk about the fact that it is not that you can’t maintain a routine, it’s that you need to adapt your normal routine to your new normal.

It’s a different perspective for sure. It’s different. And it’s doable.

I will talk about all that in a minute because first, I want to start with the morning routine.

I want you to think about how you handle your mornings. After all, how you handle them will dictate how you handle your entire day.

If you are continuously snoozing your alarm and then jump out of bed, rush around getting ready, and then run out the door, how can you expect your day not to be just like that?

Sure, we have responsibilities. We have kids and husbands and pets that all need tending to and cared for.

But it IS possible to tend and care for yourself also!

The trick is (shocker) to change your mindset first. Instead of thinking “I don’t have time in the morning for me” you need to think “I have all the time I need for me” and then MAKE the time.

If you are “looking” for time, it will never happen.

Let’s take a look at my morning routine.

I wake up at 5am-every day. Except occasionally I will allow myself to sleep in an extra hour on the weekends if I was up later the night before or not feeling well.

This is easy for me because I am a morning person. My body naturally wakes early.

But for those that have trouble waking early, start with 15-minute increments and increase from there.

I read for a minimum of 10 minutes every day. The topics of reading are all personal development, educational, self-help, or inspirational in nature.

I journal my gratitudes-every day. I actually write them out. Then I go back through and read each one slowly and actually FEEL grateful while reading them and say thank you.

I write out my 10 dreams every day. This is a practice I got from the amazing Rachel Hollis and I can do a whole session on this later, but it works just like the gratitudes. As I write them, I say and read them slowly, and say thank you as if they have already happened.

I meditate for 10 minutes every day. I meditate on my business. I meditate on my affirmations. I meditate on the life that I am creating. Whatever it is. I take this quiet time for me.

So, as you can see, I am at about 30 minutes total. Notice what DID NOT HAPPEN…

I did not once say I checked my email, social media, the news, or picked up any electronic device of any kind.

When you are first waking up, your subconscious is still fully engaged so you definitely do not want to infiltrate it with all of the negative or stimulating things that can send you spinning first thing.

Now, I am awake and feeling refreshed and so I get out of bed and get ready for my workout.

My workouts last anywhere from 30-60 minutes depending on how I feel and what I am doing. I work out at home so if you have to drive somewhere, be sure to plan your time accordingly.

Now, my workouts aren’t always hard and intense. The goal is to move the body for 30 minutes at an elevated heart rate. That’s it. EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.

Some days, I do what I call a “get ready for work workout” where I start my activity on my Fitbit and start marching in place and then pick up the stepping while I am tending to the dog, packing, my lunch, making my bed, getting my clothes ready.

I incorporate jumping jacks, running in place, high knees, etc. every few minutes to get a little spike in the heart rate.

I do squats and lunges while I am brushing my teeth.

I then do some push-ups and crunches, a little stretching, and then hit the shower.

I am ready to hit the road. Or, in this case with my current situation, hit my dining room table and get to work.

I had to develop this way of working out because I have such a long commute to the office and I am not able to work out at night, so I work in a workout as I get ready.

You can do the same with chores but I add my 80’s music and it becomes a dance party!

That’s the morning routine guys. It’s not glamorous but I LOVE my morning routine because it sets me up for great success for the rest of the day.

And speaking of, now let’s talk about the daily structure. Adapting your normal routine to your “new normal”.

I am going to use my daily “normal” as an example so if you have kids at home, you can adapt their daily normal to your “new normal” as well.

And speaking of…the whole workout thing. I see so many of you saying that you “can’t work out at home because you have kids”. I call BS on that. Here’s why:

They can do what you are doing! And they will love being included AND get their own exercise going!

So, in the example of my “getting ready for work workout”, have them do the same. As they are “getting ready” have them keep their feet moving while making the bed as you are doing the same.

Then yell out “20 jumping jacks” and you stop and all do them together. Keep doing that until everyone has completed the said tasks. SIMPLE GUYS.

Ok, back to the daily structure.

I have two words for you. TIME BLOCKING.

I am not even kidding.

USE YOUR CALENDAR!

Actually block out the time you will be working out.

Block out the time you need to spend “working”.

Now working for you should be as close to the normal time and hours spent you would be working during a regular day.

If you have been furloughed or laid off and have kiddos at home, your working time would be the time you are spending homeschooling or doing activities with them.

But you need to time block this.

I am not blessed to have kiddos at home while also trying to work from home but I do have some thoughts and suggestions as to how to manage both.

By no means will this be perfect. But keep trying, stay flexible, and you will get to your new normal.

Incorporate their “study” time with time that you are “working”. That way you all are focused at the same time.

Take breaks and get up and move, and start again.

But time block this.

Set a block of time for each task, study/work hour, workout, whatever on your digital calendar and set a reminder to go off when you should be ready for each task.

This will help you stay focused, more efficient, and hopefully less stressed about your day.

I have some people say that they have to time block their showers because they will forget..and that’s ok!

So, I hope this helps. I am available for questions or bouncing ideas. And as always, you can book a call with me to talk about this or any other issue you are having and we can look and see if hiring a coach is the logical next step. Click here for access to my calendar.

April 13, 2020April 13, 2020

What is Your Plan During Uncertainty?

Today I want to talk about money and career/jobs and ask if you are prepared for your next move.

When we are in such an uncertain time with a forced stay at home order, some may be able to survive by just working their jobs at home and some will have to take a layoff order and file unemployment.

If you have your own business, the physical brick and mortar locations are forced to close while other service types or sales businesses that can be worked from home tend to slow down and even come to a halt because people are scared to spend money.

Which of these are you?

Me, I fall into a couple of these categories. I have a full-time accounting job (that I was laid off from, called back in 24 hours later, and now am just waiting to see what happens next), and since I started writing this, I was laid off again.

While the stay at home orders were being issued all over the state I live in, I was still having to drive to the office every day. My company didn’t believe in working from home. It’s all about butts in seats for them. A very old-school way of thinking. That is, until our Governor made it mandatory state-wide. I was able to work from home for 2 weeks and I am so grateful that I had that time to keep earning.

I also have my coaching practice. This, I do from home, but I recognize the state of the economy now and am shifting a bit with my focus and offerings. I aim to be visible and available while offering as much support as I can.

And, I have my husband. He is considered “essential”. He is in the construction industry, which thank goodness, has not ceased yet. He also holds his Master Plumber license so he can provide service to those in need of a plumber.

What would happen if we became unable to work?

My husband and I talk about this at length. Although we are so grateful he still has his job during this unsettling time, the reality is imminent. We could both become unemployed…at any given time.

Are we set up for this? I have to honestly tell you, no. We are not.

You see, we were doing great, but he had to step away from a better paying job at the end of last year so that he could improve in his career. He took a month off to study and test for his Master Plumber’s license and then had to take a position with a company making about 60% less than what he was making.

He had to do it though. And the timing wasn’t great because here we are.

My practice slowed down quite a bit so my secondary income has also slowed down quite a bit.

I have become unemployed, although temporary, I just don’t know for how long.

And out of this, we have used most of the savings up because of living between his unemployed month and reduction in income.

So we are sitting in the same place as most of you all are. And knowing that unemployment really only covers about 1/4 of our living expenses is no help.

But our mindset is that of survival. We are grateful now for what we have and we have faith that we will come out of this just fine.

So what do you do?

First things first. Check-in with your mindset. Are you freaking out? Are you ONLY focused on what you DON’T have? If so, that isn’t going to help your situation AT ALL.

You need to make a plan. You need to make a plan NOW, not when it’s over.

Look at your spending habits over the past couple of months. Where is that money going? Is there anything you can live without for a couple of months?
How about TV/Cable? Is there any miscellaneous spending you are doing for things that are not necessities?
Create a budget
- Base your income on the guaranteed minimum. If it is unemployment, base it on that amount first.
- List out the necessities and dollar amounts of things that you NEED to survive:
  - Rent/Mortgage
  - Electricity
  - Gas
  - Water/Sewer
  - Phone
  - Auto-lease/note
  - Food
  - Auto-Gas (if you are still working and need to drive to get there)
- Is your income enough to cover these items? If the answer is no:
  - Figure out how much you can pay for each one if you can pay any of it.
  - Don’t look at the payment as what you are SUPPOSED to pay, rather look at it as how much you CAN pay at this time over the next month or so.
  - Contact the companies and tell them your situation and how much you CAN pay, if any. Believe me, these companies are going to work with you.
Get your resume updated!
- People are still hiring. You can take a temporary job until you figure this all out. Let go of your ego! Go work at the grocery store stocking shelves. Go work in the Amazon warehouse. Find something to supplement your income for now.
- You need to be applying to jobs all over the place. What if your current company doesn’t come back from this? You need to be prepared to hit the ground running. Plus, interviewing is a great practice!
Take that class/training you have wanted to take but haven’t had the time for.
Have you thought about starting your own business? Do it now!
- It doesn’t happen overnight, so get it all ready today so that you can be ready to hit the ground running.

Don’t wait for this to be all over before you get started, guys. This is too important!

Remember to focus on only the things you CAN control and you CAN control how you respond to all of this. Take a proactive stance. Stop being reactive!

And don’t forget, I am here to help! If you need someone to bounce ideas off of. If you need some added support. If you are already a boss babe or are looking to become one, I can help with those wanting to grow their businesses or ladies who are just starting and need some help. If you are considering becoming a coach, I can help with that too! NOW IS THE TIME LADIES!

I have space in my 1×1 Action for Change coaching program for those who are ready to take some action TODAY so that they can be ready for tomorrow.

If any of this is appealing to you, let’s talk about it! Book some time on my calendar for a free 30-minute breakthrough session so that we can where you are headed!

April 1, 2020April 1, 2020

Surviving a World of Uncertainty

The world is CRAZY right now! Many of you are thinking “How in the heck am I supposed to keep a positive mindset when I don’t even know if I am going to have food to put on the table right now?”

The key IS your mindset.

I am always saying thoughts become things.

Your THOUGHTS create feelings and your FEELINGS create your ACTION.

So think about the toilet paper situation-yes, the toilet paper. It’s what is happening right now and it’s a good metaphor to see how this all transpires.

When someone starts to think “what happens if the world shuts down and I run out of toilet paper?” That thought then creates a feeling of fear and lack. So, in response to that feeling, said person decides to take action and runs to the store to buy as much toilet paper as he or she can to ensure that he or she will not run out, thinking this will dissipate the fear.

Did the fear go away? No!

Because it isn’t about the toilet paper at all. It’s about how the person is thinking about what is going on.

How could this have been different?

By reframing the original thought.

Now, I want you to know that I am not looking at this situation through rose-colored glasses and not believing this is a real pandemic. Quite the contrary.

I am fully aware of the severity of the situation. I am being affected by what is going on around me directly.

I have elderly, not well parents that could be literally taken out if they caught this virus.

My Tai Chi center closed until further notice so that we can participate in the social distancing.

We have a friend that stayed with us a couple or weekends ago and was not aware that his mother, who lives with him, has not been feeling well the past few weeks. Her doc asked her to come in and there was a good chance she may have needed to be tested.

Which meant our friend would have had to be tested and in turn, if that test came back positive, we would have had to be tested.

Good news, Mom only had one of the symptoms and actually had a sinus infection causing her to feel yucky.

A couple of weeks ago, I was laid off from my job. Fortunately, I called back and a week later, was told that we were all going to start working from home because of the state mandated Stay at Home order.

Everything is still uncertain for me as to if I will have a job tomorrow.

Does any of these scenarios cause fear within me? A little, sure.

However, the difference with how I am CHOOSING to respond is how I look at the situation. My thoughts around what is going on may be quite different than yours. I am NOT living in a state of fear and allowing it to consume me.

Am I concerned about our medical system? Am I concerned about my future and how I am going to come out of all of this, especially since I just launched two program offerings RIGHT BEFORE this all went down?

Sure I am! But it is NOT dictating my life.

I am carrying on, business as usual, with even more passion, vigor, and drive. I know this is all temporary. We will come out of this.

And, I look at this as an opportunity. An opportunity to educate, create awareness, and hope that I can make a difference in someone else’s outlook, which is life-changing.

I am the beacon of light in a dark situation. I know this. This is my gift and what better time to burn the light even brighter?

I went live last Sunday in my private Facebook group, from my bed (because it was self-care day) and again Monday morning and talked about the state of fear we, as a society, are operating in and how we can survive the state of uncertainty. I also posted about gratitude and how gratitude is the antidote to fear.

I practice gratitude every. Single. Day. All. Day.

It is the number one way to stay resonating at my highest power and combat fear or any other feelings of uncertainty.

In addition to gratitude, here are 4 things that you can do to make this time a bit more bearable:

Move your body-exercise is the number one top thing you can do to mitigate depression and anxiety. It releases all of the feel-goods that we need in our bodies to maintain a healthy outlook, not to mention it makes us physically feel good.

Talk about your feelings-holding in is never good no matter the situation. My husband and I talk every night about the things that transpired during the day and discuss how we feel about it and what our next steps will be.

Be hyper-aware of what you are consuming from the media and eliminate that which does not serve you. The media is not necessarily your friend. Don’t take their updates as truth. Question everything. The news is here to instill the fear so that you stay glued to the TV which increases ratings. That’s all. Do your research. Stay educated but not through the news or what people post on social media.

Only focus on what you can control. You can’t control what is going on “out there”. You CAN control how you respond. You CAN control if you wash your hands or keep the social distance. You CAN control if you are bombarding your thoughts with fear-based information.

So, check-in and see how you are responding to what is going on around you. If you are stuck in a state of fear, choose to get out!

Start implementing gratitude and the 4 recommendations and start to thrive in this horrible situation.

As always, you can contact me anytime. I am here for you. If you would like to get a bit deeper with this topic and are considering hiring a coach, contact me! Here is the direct link to my calendar. I offer FREE 30-minute breakthrough calls to see where you and how to get you to where you want to be. Just click Here-http://bit.ly/TiffenysBreakthroughCall

March 23, 2020March 23, 2020

Boundaries

Let’s talk a little bit about boundaries. You know how I love to define everything so let’s look at what boundaries are:

From Wikipedia: Personal boundaries are guidelines, rules or limits that a person creates to identify reasonable, safe and permissible ways for other people to behave towards them and how they will respond when someone passes those limits.

I love how Mel Robbins explains boundaries.

“Boundaries are the courage you need to put yourself 1st. They are the fence around the yard called your life.”

Well, that’s great, but how do you know when you should set a boundary? You can identify where you need to set some boundaries by asking yourself some questions:

Do other people’s needs seem more urgent than yours?
Is your energy level drained?
Do you hate to disappoint people?
Are you afraid that if you don’t do what people ask they will be mad at you?
Do you feel as if your kids or your friends run your life?
Do you have a hard time saying no?
What am I allowing to happen in my life?

Beware, there is often a negative stigma when it comes to boundaries. Boundaries are often associated with something BAD you have to do and for God’s sake, you should NEVER have to set boundaries because if you do, there is something wrong with YOU.

I am here to tell you that boundaries are necessary. Boundaries are needed for self-protection.

Boundaries are also needed for those who have difficulty dealing with those people who don’t have boundaries themselves.

Boundaries should be set for others that come into your world and boundaries should be set for yourself.

Ultimately, setting any boundaries should be viewed as a form of protection for YOU.

Mel Robbins says:

“Boundaries are the no trespassing sign between where you end and someone else begins. They make you treat people how you want to be treated.”

You may need to set boundaries for toxic people in your life. You may need to set boundaries for yourself when it involves toxic people in your life.

But beware that when you do this, the outcome may not be pretty.

The other person may see it as a threat or an attack on them and will definitely play on any weakness you have to try and manipulate you to get you to do what they want.

So I suggest you start small and you get crystal clear with what your boundary will be or is. You also should COMMUNICATE it to the person. Don’t just expect them to KNOW.

AND, you have to be prepared to FOLLOW THROUGH or they will not take you or your boundaries seriously.

If you are someone who is an adult child of an alcoholic/addict, a co-dependant, or someone that is in need of constant approval, setting boundaries is going to be difficult for you…in the beginning. I speak from experience as someone who is an adult child of an addict/alcoholic, a co-dependant, and a person that was CONSTANTLY seeking approval.

I was a “good girl”. I never rocked the boat. I did everything everyone ever asked of me. I NEVER caused a scene.

And it was slowly KILLING me.

I have SO many examples I could share with you from my life, but I am going to spare you and only share one. Probably one of the BIGGEST of my life.

It involves my mother.

My parents divorced at 5 and mom found a new boyfriend in what seemed like minutes and she moved him right in.

It wasn’t long before the abuse started. First, he started with her and then moved on to us. We weren’t just physically abused, but severely mentally abused as well.

And then my world shattered and she married this man and we were made to call him Dad.

This contributed to my finding ways to be invisible. Don’t draw attention to yourself. ALWAYS do what you are told and be a good girl. But constantly trying to get the attention of the only person I needed it from…my mother.

Of course, this was not a sustainable relationship between my mom and the “step-father”. It finally ended when he chose another woman over my mom, which, in turn, made her spin out of control.

At 12, I became the adult female in our house while mom continued to plummet. Drugs, pills, alcohol, suicide after suicide attempt, going through men like they were water. You name it.

But I still sought her approval. I needed her recognition and attention. I never got it.

I just developed codependent behaviors that I carried with me well into adulthood. I was the fixer and the caretaker of all things, including my mother.

After many years of watching my mother killing herself with the drugs and alcohol and coming to the realization I will never get the mother I wanted, I set the biggest boundary of my life.

One final trip to the ER to rescue her from a fake “chest pain” incident so that she could get pain meds and get high, I hit my limit.

I told her that if she didn’t get into a program and work on her shit in therapy, we were done. And I meant every word.

Two months later, I got a call from my now step-father saying that mom was getting help. I asked where and he said the methadone clinic.

I said not good enough. No treatment and no therapy, no relationship with me.

As I hung up the phone, I never felt more empowered in my entire life.

On a deep, beyond the surface level, I knew that I had just saved my own life.

It has been around 10 years since I have had a relationship with her and I have to say, nothing has changed for her. She is still the same person I let go of so long ago.

Had I continued down that path I was on with her, I would not be where I am today. Strong enough to stand in my own truth and able to help other women who struggle.

So, that is one example of a BIG boundary. Not every boundary you set needs to be this extreme, however, I hope that as you gain more confidence, you also start to feel more empowered.

No matter how big or small you think the boundary is, its effect is the same. A necessary aspect of life to keep you safe from the toxicity around you.

So start practicing saying no.

Start practicing setting limits to what you will put up with from other people.

Set limits within yourself so that you can abide by your own rules.

Remember, YOU are in control of YOU. Nobody else has the right to overstep and take your power away so don’t let them!

Do you want to dive deeper into how to set boundaries in YOUR life? Book your free 30-Minute breakthrough call today! Just click HERE for access to my calendar!